"The children will end up feeling the burden and the responsibility of making their parent happy," says John Gray, Ph.D., author of and the founder of the Mars and Venus seminars and workshops.When you’re first dating all you need to say is that you’re going out with a friend. If you’re getting to the point when it’s time for your kids to meet this new partner, create a scene for success. Say that you’d like them to meet this special friend (they should know the person’s name by now).They don’t even have to know his or her name at this stage. Reassure them “All kids want to know is that they’re still the most important people in your life no matter what. You can acknowledge their question, assess whether or not it’s one you should answer and just simply tell them that you aren’t going to answer that right now. Then listen, acknowledge and validate—no matter what their reaction is.She looked right at me and laughed, “Give it 10 years, you’ll have lots of company.” She was right.
I remember saying to my mom that I didn’t know anyone else who was divorced, single parenting and dating.
Christian counselor Ron Deal shares his thoughts about dating and remarriage, and encourages those who are divorced or widowed to be intentional about creating a home that is redemptive, even if remarriage never happens.
Weighing in on the topic is Pastor Rob Bugh and his wife, Rhonda, who have a blended family of nine; and Sabrina Beasley, whose seven-year marriage ended in 2010 when her husband was killed in a car accident, leaving her a single mother of two.
“This is one of those cases where less is more,” she says.
“Provide basic information to a child, depending on age and developmental stage.” And remember: They’re your kids, not your friends.
It might be helpful to develop a slow and steady mindset that reminds you that an infinite supply of love is always available. If you can be a steady rock of truth, support, and guidance, you teach your kids that they can deal with anything. Don’t take your kids on dates when you are not in a committed relationship.