You have probably been matched because you are highly compatible and a good online rapport may have built up because you initiate as much of the contact as he does but if this contact isn’t leading to dates, or if a first date hasn’t led to a second date it may be that he just isn’t that interested in you – here’s how to tell for sure. He won’t give you time The first and most concrete of signs that a guy isn’t that into you is that he won’t give you time – he doesn’t respond to your texts or emails quickly (within 24 hours); is evasive when it comes to meeting up and generally seems to put everything else in his life ahead of you and getting to know you better.You shouldn’t have to beg for a scrap of his attention or back him into a corner to fix up a date; only see him late at night or put up with flaky timekeeping or being stood up.This way, if you run into these situations in the future, you'll remember this article and can avoid investing your hope (and time) on Mr. The follow-up after a first date is rarely as simple as: "I like you, I had fun, let's get together again." First, there are layers of meaning in texts to unpack coupled with the actual timing: who reaches out first and how quickly does the other person respond? Either party can play coy because a) Despite attempts to put up an aloof front, though, there are a number a things men do to clue you in that they're interested.Below, our guy expert Rich Santos spells out some of the motives and reasonings coming from the other end, to spare you the next-day mental math. While the act of simply seeing the date through to its end may seem like an obligation for most people, Santos indicates that there *are* exceptional dating disasters where he simply has to cut it short for his own sanity."Most people are courteous enough to do the absolute minimum on a date: finish whatever activity you're doing together and devote sufficient time out of respect for the other person," he says, so provided your date's not running out with an "emergency text from a roommate" after twenty minutes, it's an easy first sign that there wasn't any major fire to put out.It may be that he was really attentive when you first met and swept you off your feet with his advances but as the relationship has moved on he has become more and more elusive, sometimes disappearing for days or weeks at a time.For some men it is the thrill of the chase that drives them forward but once they have caught the prize – usually sex for them but many women give their hearts too – their attention wanes and they start looking for the next pretty face.
That's because unconscious body language signals can be extremely telling, says Patti Wood, a body language expert with more than 30 years of experience and author of So, in the early stages of a new relationship (like when you first meet an online date), look out for the following signs to get a sense of what he's thinking.1. Either you're in a super-dark place, or this subtle signal means he's into you. People tend to use this subconscious expression to help open their eyes when they like what they see. If he really likes you, though, he might pull back extra-slowly and smile sweetly as he does it, which means he wants to take the time to get closer to you. If he angles his hips away from you, it's probably the latter. "The feet tend to point where the heart wants to go," Wood says. If he crosses them in a way that turns his torso and upper body away from you, he might be disinterested. Wood says this could be a sign he's keeping his options open. So feel him out, and look for other signs on this list before you go reassure him. When he holds your hand, he presses his palm against yours.When your date wants to spend time with you alone instead of calling in backup for a group date, says Santos, it likely means that he's comfortable around you and wants to spend more time getting to know you."One tactic to combat a boring date," he says, "is calling in 'reinforcement' friends" as social buffers."Dilation is a brain response that occurs when you like and are attracted to something," Wood says. If he raises his brows ever so slightly while you're talking, it means he's interested in whatever you're saying. He might not show off a toothy grin while casually flirting, but on a really awesome date when he's having loads of fun? Real smiles extend well beyond the mouth: They lift the forehead and give you slightly squinty eyes. When you're attracted to someone, your mouth produces extra saliva, Wood says. You might think that a guy who is totally enamored by you will find it hard to peel his eyes away. But when he subconsciously takes a deep breath — he'll pull in his stomach and puff out his chest — it's a subconscious way to make his upper body look broader and his waist look smaller, two qualities that make him look more fit and (from an evolutionary perspective) more desirable, Wood says. In a noisy bar, this sign might not hold much weight. Of course, timing is super important in interpreting the feet: If you're talking to a guy who seems interested, you touch his arm, and then see his feet angle away from you, the context says he's no longer interested. But if he crosses his legs away and turns the rest of his body toward you, it could just mean that he's shy, depending on the guy. But don't rush to judge a great conversationalist just because he chats you up while he faces forward. The throat represents communication and vulnerability, Wood says. This kind of full-fledged hand-holding signifies a desire to connect. If he's constantly two steps ahead of you, it means he's more concerned about himself than you, Wood says.Look for teeth: "When he feels really happy, he's not covering that up," Wood says. If his smile involves his whole face, it means you're genuinely affecting him in a good way. In response, he might quickly lick his lips or press them together. But now that everyone is used to being glued to their phones, nonstop eye contact can make people feel uncomfortable. In other words, he's into you and he's trying to attract you. But when he can physically hear you perfectly well and leans in anyway, it means he's interested in what you have to say — and you, in general. He puts his hands on his hips with his elbows out to the sides. If he makes an effort to find a common thread or asks you lots of questions, his body language may reflect his personality (shy), and he could actually be totally enthralled by you. If he reaches up to touch it during your interaction, he's interested in you and worried about coming across well. The same goes for interlocking fingers, while an arched palm means he's scared or may be holding something back (literally). Unless he's leading you through a scary or crowded space, he should adjust his pace to match yours.A guy who really likes you wants to know all about you, and he doesn't limit his communication to 2 am.